in all the world there is no one else exactly like me – everything that comes out of me is authentically mine because i alone chose it
i own everything about me – my body, my feelings, my mouth, my voice, all my actions, whether they be to others or to myself
i own my fantasies, my dreams, my hopes, my fears – i own all my triumphs and successes, all my failures and mistakes
because i own all of me, i can become intimately acquainted with me – by doing so i can love me and be friendly with all my parts
i know there are aspects about myself that puzzle me, and other aspects that i do not know
but as long as i am friendly and loving to myself, i can courageously and hopefully look for solutions to the puzzles and for ways to find out more about me
however i look and sound, whatever i say and do, and whatever i think and feel at a given moment in time is authentically me
if later some parts of how i looked, sounded, thought and felt turn out to be unfitting, i can discard that which is unfitting, keep the rest, and invent something new for that which i discarded
i can see, hear, feel, think, say and do
i have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be productive, and to make sense and order out of the world of people and things outside of me
i own me, and therefore i can engineer me
i am me
i am okay!
there seems to lie in all of us to one degree or another a reticence of sorts, a reluctance to own – or own up to – our very personal accomplishments --- what’s that all about? – when did the child’s naiveté and ingenuousness wither and die – where did the glow of the ember of self-pride go when it evaporated???
i was told that as a very little girl, i had a terrible time making friends with the potty, and when finally i produced a golden egg i would run, crowing my face off, to let everyone know - moreover to lead the parade to “show and tell” of my great intrepid accomplishment – when i was about six i was overcome by the feeling of a deed well done when (i mistakenly thought) i had dyed a pair of navy and white saddle shoes navy and red with the inspired application of cordovan polish to the white of the shoe – a very proud moment for me!!! --- i was dead wrong, but too young to know it, and so thought i was deserving of great kudos as opposed to the reaction that i ultimately had to endure ---
now i do things which are legitimately great, but i’m usually too awkward and bashful to accept a direct compliment graciously without belittling myself in the process – SAD!!!
so ……….... now comes the ideal chance to sing my own praises – damn the torpedoes and full steam ahead!!!
i am a good friend, a good listener, extremely loyal, and always go the extra mile if it’s within my power to do so – i do not break a confidence unless i deem it is the very best and most appropriate thing to do on a friend’s behalf --- i have many many acquaintances, but a very short list of real friends – there is a tremendous difference between the two in my mind!!! --- i am trying hard to learn the art, science and spirit of becoming my own best friend; however, the road seems a little tricky as i go, full of pitfalls and stumbling blocks – hard to find my way back to that place and time of being that precious little nontoxic me – i ought to have left behind a few breadcrumbs!
as a loving partner i have always gone above and beyond, doing innumerable little extras for my hero, always respecting him and never lying to him --- i’ve recognized his little quirks and allowed for them in our lives, just as my hero has tolerated my own oddities --- i’m responsible, dependable, punctual, and more laid back about things than thirty or forty years ago, to be sure – my spontaneity and sense of humour are things about me to be appreciated – and i’m a good cook!!! --- in the summer, i have beautiful flower gardens and a killer tan!